An interesting way to spend my last night in Ontario… Locked outside…

so its 2:56 am and guess where I am?

think hard…

if you say Ontario, you are half correct. If you say she’s in Ontario, locked outside on the screened in porch of a friends house.. Then you are completely one hundred percent bingo on the dollar correct.

Don’t laugh at me, I didn’t mean to get locked out

maybe I’m not even locked out.I havent checked the doors in desperation. Part of me doesnt want to get excited about the chance of going back inside to a comfy bed and a toilet.. Oh did I mention I have to go pee?

So yes I havnt got up to check the door; it made a satisfying click while the host closed it, tuned off all the lights and went to bed I am pretty sure he dosn’t realise that one of his guests is outside on the screened porch…. so I mean really its like going up to an obviously pregnant lady and asking if she is pregnant.

I will kick myself if I later find out it is unlocked.

anyways I found a laptop outside and thought.

hmm I could make use of this solitary time to actually write about something since I havent  blogged in quite a while.

So it is my last night in Ontario,

what is the opposite of homesick?

Is there even a word for that?

because that is what I feel right now,

sadly I am pretty sure most kids are excited to come home see their friends,

party,

ya know

your average stereotype of a teenager.

well frankly my dear im not your average teenager,

one: I stand out like a black sheep at a dog show,

two: I’m one of those artist kids, so as you can see I was somewhat doomed  from ever being normal ever since I ditched the party in my mother’s womb.

but really why would you want to be ?, normal that is, I would never give up my artistic talents even if it meant that I could have an extra toe.

three: I have successfully locked out myself but I am too lazy to check the door to see if it’s actually locked. Maybe that is a normal teenage thing, not sure. Will have to check that one out.

So it is my last night in Ontario, every time I come back here to visit family and friends I always hate the time when it comes to say goodbye.

it’s a pang of sadness, knowing that it will probably be one or even two years until  I see them again. and it’s not like they are annoying or crazy… they are amazing people who are very hospitable.

So as I listen to crickets the thought struck me, why do I feel more at home when I am not at home?

like not the feeling of you know walking around in your underwear and hitting up the fridge at 2 in the morning.. that is different, I mean the feeling of acceptance, the feeling that you can just blend in, that there are people with more similarities then differences, and that you feel happy when your there.

people may think I am lame,depressed, or maybe just some retard you likes being locked outdoors… But it is true.

I am a retard that likes being locked outdoors…

Just kidding.

when I went to Kamloops to visit my father’s side of the family I felt at home there. the unconditional love and beautiful energy that surrounded you constantly was a wonderful reminder that these were your people. I do get that feeling from my immediate family and close friends at home but I don’t know,my town puts such a damper on things. Its like having a wet towel to dry off when you hop outta of the shower, it can really piss you off at times.

There is something howling in the forest now, so I might as well make myself comfy on the chaise lounge and enjoy the wilderness. Somehow I find that more awesome then getting dinky soaps that smell like a wet dog at hotels. So thank you Rick for locking me outside, it was a pleasent surprise and an excellent exuse to blog at an insane time. Sometimes retarded artistic abnormal teenagers need to be locked outdoors overnight. It can inspire them to write about stuff, and also confront their fears about being locked outside in the dark, becuase really, it wasn’t that bad.

xx

Macey, myself, and Spencer ( The host’s adorable dogs )

 

Advertisements

who I am. <3 (via teghansteatime)

who I am. <3 I really just wanna pack up my life when I move, like I wanna take EVERYTHING. all of my clothes & all of my grad presents & all of everything else. my pictures and Teddy bears & my whole bed and my hope chest & my bookcase & all the little stuff; my grad cap & all my jewlery (which is something I have waaay too much of) & all of my books & movies and just .. all of it. but I know I can’t because I will be li … Read More

via teghansteatime

Professional Wedding Photography Studio Los Angeles by Top Wedding Photographer Shaun Alexander (via Fashion photographers Blog)

Professional Wedding Photography Studio Los Angeles by Top Wedding Photographer Shaun Alexander Voted best wedding photography studio in Los Angeles, Shaun Alexander Photography offers fashion photography, high-fashion wedding photography, and beauty photography. Professional wedding Studio Shaun Alexander Photography Considering that there are variety of options, prices, and wedding photographers available to you, a few major factors separates us from the rest: 1. 100% professionalism – With over 25 years of outstanding photography, … Read More

via Fashion photographers Blog

Sunsets in the colorful neighborhoods of Porto… (via Dakota .D Journal)

Sunsets in the colorful neighborhoods of Porto… What intrigued me the most about Porto were it’s snippets of visual imperfection and the way that decay exists here amongst what is living. In the local neighborhoods of the city there are apartments that seem abandoned by time, whilst others are still inhabited with life, in more than just one form. Colors here are vibrant and rich with contrast, and the details of patterns, both engraved and smooth, are enhanced with a type of blackness t … Read More

via Dakota .D Journal

These Kids On The Beach Have No Home, But Have Hope Thru Sound…. (via thelostmusicdepartment)

These Kids On The Beach Have No Home, But Have Hope Thru Sound…. These kids are all ages. Some have homes, some don’t. Some are young, some are elderly. We make people smile for just being in existence. We need a new canopy to protect us from the sun. We need strings, picks, guitars, an AMP for heavens sake! We need more instruments for people to check out (horns, brass, violins, violas, cellos) and we need a bigger truck to bring them to the beach, or a real stationary Library that has a few rehearsal r … Read More

via thelostmusicdepartment

Here in Vancouver: the street waste we produce (via Lou & Liz)

Here in Vancouver: the street waste we produce Have you ever taken a look at what gets put into the street garbage bins around Vancouver? I haven’t, but I heard from Vancouver City Councillor Reimer that the majority of the on street garbage is coffee cups (actual numbers to come soon)! Disposable coffee cups don’t weigh all that much, but they do take up a lot of space; they’re quite a waste of space if you think about it, they’re kind of bulky and hollow inside which … Read More

via Lou & Liz

What are my options? (via Lou & Liz)

What are my options?     OR Walking into any coffee shop to get a drink is a fairy regular activity for a lot of people (or maybe you use the drive-through), but when you forget your reusable coffee mug at home, what are you going to do? In some cases where you’re in a rush to get somewhere, your options are coffee in a disposable cup or none. With a little time to spare, however, did you know that you can ask for a ceramic or glass cup “for-her … Read More

via Lou & Liz

aftermath (via quotingeccentricity)

aftermath Have you lost your way? Living in the shadow of the messes that you made And so it goes! Everything inside your circle starts to overflow Take a step before you leap Into the colours that you seek You’ll get back what you give away So don’t look back on yesterday Wanna scream out No more hiding Don’t be afraid of what’s inside Gonna tell ya you’ll be alright In the aftermath Anytime anybody pulls you down Anytime any … Read More

via quotingeccentricity